Ever wondered how you ended up here? How exactly did life happen? The kids, the bills, the mortgage, the soul destroying job and the never ending housework and things to do?
Where did that free spirit, idealistic and opportunistic version of you go? Did you disappear? Sometime around 30, or maybe 25 or even 40.
A few months back I was lucky enough to work with a dynamo who told me all about her struggle. The struggle to make a choice.
Imagine. Coming home from work. Tired. It’s late. Too late. And, Deb, well she is tired. Bone tired. Her real job, her life, has sucked the marrow out of her bone. Too many clients. Too many pressures. Too much conflict.
But at her core. Deb knows there is a better way. AND this is where the conversation gets interesting.
Choose the scary option
You see, the thing for Deb was that she actually knew the answer. But, the struggle is real. In Deb’s world there is a choice. A choice between the conservative, safe road and the creative, but scary road.
Now the safe road means staying in the same job, with a predictable outcome and a predictable salary. Safe.
But the creative, scary road, means taking a big jump off the cliff and investing in a new opportunity. Scary.
So here is the thing. We don’t grow in safe harbors. We only grow when we are tested, pushed and shoved. So my money is on the scary option.
Interestingly, we all, like Deb, forget that at some point, that the predictable job wasn’t so predictable before.
It was scary. Our first day. Our first client.
So if we think about it, we have already proven to ourselves that we can navigate a scary road.
And, if we have taken the scary road before, we know that we can do it again. We have a proven ability to back ourselves into a new experience.
Laser like focus
When we take the scary road over the safe road we are going to need to keep our eyes firmly fixed on the horizon. Because, again, we know that from experience, learning something new is tough.
Remember when you learnt to drive. Do you remember the experience of changing gears, using an indicator and moving the steering wheel? ALL AT THE SAME TIME. It was a ginormous scary moment. But these days, we barely think about our driving. Often times we can arrive at home, not consciously aware of how got there.
So while we are learning to navigate this new, scary road, we do need to apply a laser like focus to our learning. It will be hard. It will be awkward. But it will be worth it.
Own your own shit
Another great mate of mine, Sandy, left me with a lifelong lesson. Sadly, she is not here today to take the credit, but every day I hear her voice.
Years ago, I was contracted to deliver a leadership session as a favor to a client. Well lets just say that the feedback from the client was pretty bad. About me. And, the crap job that I had just delivered.
Well, Sandy bless her sat me down on a bar stool in our local, filled my glass and let me complain. But, during the second glass into my assassination of this woman, she asked me the question that has changed my life.
‘Kezza‘ she said, ‘what is really going on for you, that this woman so far up your arse?’
Now this is not very elegant or a refined, psychologically approved approach.
But it is a gamechanger.
For you see. This rough and ready approach, forced me to look at Kerry and explore what was going on for her such that the perception of another human had me so rattled.
This day, was the day that I truly got the lesson that we are all responsible for our own shit.
100% responsible for our own shit.
Other people will come and go with their shit, but we are responsible for identifying, owning and dealing with our shit.
And, guess what? On the scary road you will find your demons and you will need to slay them so that you can create the type of life that you truly want.
Living your best life
If you are keen for change, but don’t know where to start, I am always up for a chat.
Living your best life starts the day you make a choice to take the scary, creative, and audacious road.
I have spent a lifetime making choices that take me down the scary road. It has been bumpy, scary and the best thing I have ever down.
I have also spent a lifetime solving problems. Business problems. People problems. And, of course property problems.
So if you are up for a no obligation, free chat, flick me a line and we can find a space in our worlds where the stars align and we can chat.
Yes! I want to live my best life!
We might talk about careers, kids, staff, leadership, decision making or simply how to move through some tough shit.
We can also talk about serious stuff like property, people and business. Or we could just swap #lifehacks for living on your terms.
Either way. It will be fun and shed some light on that decision that you need to make.